Humble Pie

Being a mom is hard. I am learning, trying new things, failing regularly, but picking myself up in an attempt to do better tomorrow.

As Asher grows, he presents new challenges to me. Some days he's sweet as can be, obedient, talkative, and willing to try new things. Other days he says no to everything, seems to be grumpy, and doesn't want to have to do anything.

I know that preschool is challenging him in new ways. Sometimes I think his reticence comes from the challenges he faces three days a week. He has a wonderful teacher who works really hard with the kids to help them learn and prepare for kindergarten amidst a variety of stimulating activities. But there is work involved. She has the kids do lots of "writing" and coloring. He has to write his name regularly. Asher doesn't like to write. He has never liked coloring. But he's doing it. It may take some cajoling. I have to be encouraging what seems like every step of the way. It can seem like a painfully slow process, but the process is where the learning comes, right?

At the end of his first week of preschool, his teacher talked to me about the fact that they couldn't get him to even try using scissors to cut paper, and I would need to work with him on this. Talk about a humbling moment. To be honest, Asher had hardly ever touched scissors. He wasn't interested, and I didn't want him hurting himself or doing damage, so I never thought much about it. This, of course, changed almost immediately.

If I know anything about Asher it is that he is not one to jump into something without watching and studying first. And he doesn't like being the center of attention. So when he could work with me one on one with the scissors and cutting, he caught on. He's no speed demon with the scissors, but he can cut on a line, and so we've been cutting out triangles, squares, diamonds. He even help me cut out the eyes and noses for some little jack-o-lantern jars I was making.  He's making progress.

I am learning to be ever more positive and encouraging with him. I wish he loved going to preschool every day, but he doesn't. I try to talk to him about all of his friends there, his sweet teachers, and all that he is learning. I try to remind him about all of the things he is very good at, but that he will also need to work on hard and challenging things in order to get better and to grow. I spend time working with him at home. It's hard and frustrating sometimes when he is not the most willing, but I try to keep my wits about me.

Just to remind myself of the hardness of new things, I have decided to challenge myself to become proficient at using chopsticks this year. I want Asher to see me learning and growing, too. I know he can't really appreciate it at his age, but it helps me too, to stay more patient and more empathetic. So chopsticks it is anytime we eat a meal that calls for it like stir fry.

Asher and I are in this together. :)